Showing posts with label christian working moms. Show all posts
Showing posts with label christian working moms. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Making Time for Cinderella

Sunday night I did a really dumb thing. I almost missed it.

Luckily, before the moment was gone, a song came to mind reminding me not to miss it. It is another beautiful momentous song by Steven Curtis Chapman  called simply "Cinderella":

       "She spins and she sways
        To whatever song plays
        Without a care in the world
        And I'm sitting here wearing
        The weight of the world on my shoulders

        It's been a long day
        And there's still work to do
        She's pulling at me
        Saying "Dad, I need you

        There's a ball at the castle
        And I've been invited
        And I need to practice my dancing
        Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

"Ooooh I'll Dance with Cinderella..."
        So I will dance with Cinderella
        While she is here in my arms
        'Cause I know something the prince never knew
        Oooooh, I will dance with Cinderella
        I don't wanna miss even one song
        'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
        And she'll be gone..."


When this song first came out, I cried and cried each time I heard it playing, because this one sentence is ME: "It's been a long day / And there's still work to do / She's pulling at me / Saying "(Mom), I need you".   I hear myself replying "when I finish my work" to waaay too many requests from my kids. After this song came out, I made a vow to never do it again.


But Sunday night I almost did.  You see, I was busy working on end-of-month. At the end of each month, I have this huge Excel spreadsheet of stuff I have to bill for work so they can close the books out for the new month. Sunday night, I was frantically trying to get it finished before Monday morning (I was already behind! It should have been done by the 1st!) Usually at end-of-month, Chris will take care of putting the kids in bed and cleaning up after dinner so I can start working earlier than usual. But this particular night, Princess Ballerina decided she had to have me sing her bedtime songs. Chris and I take turns putting the boys and Princess to bed anyway so we can each share that special time with them throughout the week. So, typically at end-of-month, the kids are OK with Daddy putting them to bed and singing them their bedtime songs. For whatever reason, this night was different for her.

First, she asked nicely. I replied with my usual "tomorrow night I can baby girl, when I am finished with my work." So she begged "Pweeeeeeeease!" And I said "No sweetie, Mommy has work to finish." But then she got pitiful. "Mommy, I need you to sing me my songs!" And I realized I was forsaking a special moment with my girl for a measly extra few minutes of work. 5 minutes would really be all I had to sacrifice, two songs' worth.  Thankfully, God hit my upside the head and reminded me of Cinderella, and of the fact that two songs would barely be 5 minutes worth of missed work time. I realized I could totally give that up for my princess because she wanted MOMMY to sing her a song!

So I did. PB has two songs she always requests at bedtime lately: "On My Knees" by Jaci Velasquez and "Find your Wings" by Mark Harris. She calls them collectively "My knees and my wings Mommy!" I hope I never forget these moments. I hope I never miss one again.

Though I know I will.

It's comforting that even Steven Curtis Chapman almost missed a moment too!! He explains it here in the story behind the song. He wrote this song as a reminder of that almost-missed moment. I am glad he did. It continues to help me remember to focus on those moments and not let them go by. Our kids grow up too quickly as it is. It's my prayer that I can remember not to miss anymore of those precious moments.

Thanks for reading. Remember not to miss those moments with your loved ones.

Blessings,
Dianne


PS: Have you realized when you almost missed a moment but something (or Someone) slowed you down and helped you to see it before it was too late? Tell me about it! Let's help each other focus on moments & not let them slip by!!


What can we do to help us remember to slow down?? I really need help with this!!

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Yes, I am a Wannabe

Life would be SO much easier
if God had given me 6 hands!
I'm a wannabe Supermom, a wannabe Stay-at-home-mom, and a wannabe Homeschooling mom. However, none of those are in my immediate future, so I have had to learn to come to peace with being a working mom. This has been a struggle for me though, because I often feel guilt over it. (That sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?!) But, unfortunately it is very true.

And when do I feel the most guilt? When my maternity leave ends, and my numbered days of doing nothing but cuddling, nursing, and changing my baby are over and "real life" begins again. (Reality check: I know SAHMs have to do waaay more than that every day, but while we are recovering from the delivery, we are all told to do nothing more than that. Oh, and "sleep when baby sleeps", LOL. Yeah, like that can happen after baby #1!)

ANYWAY, yesterday was my first day back at work since January 7th. It was crazy. It was also kinda cool; I spoke with customers who apparently (and surprisingly!) missed me! It felt good to be missed. That helped ease the guilt some. I am also very spoiled and blessed with the job I have because Baby S was able to come to work with me. This is a HUGE blessing, since I don't have to leave him nor pump while at work. And I am eternally grateful to God for providing me with this opportunity and to my boss for being so flexible with me. He told me once the reason he wants to be flexible with me, though, is because he understands the conflict a working mom struggles with, and he wants to help me have "the best of both worlds" as much as possible.  A HUMUNGOUS BLESSING!   I know. So what's the problem?

It's that small voice inside that starts berating me for all I don't do. I read blogs or facebook updates from SAHMs about all the cool crafty activities they did with their kids that day and I whine, "why didn't I think of that?!"  Then my son comes home from a field trip crying "I wish you had come!" and my heart breaks. His field trip fell on the day I had committed to be back at work, but how do you explain that to a 6 year old?  Finally, I look around my house at the tornado of a mess it has become and I feel like the worst mom ever. My kids are gonna grow up thinking their mom flunked Mom 101 class.

But the Truth I know is this: God only expects me to do my best, and that is all He asks of me! So why do I demand more from  myself?

Silly girl.

So, tonight I Googled "Working Mom" and "Christian Working Mom" hoping to find some women who I'd have the most in common. So far all the blogs I have stumbled upon seem to be by SAHMs who are oh-so crafty and/or organized that I feel smaller and smaller each time I read their posts, making the guilt worse word by word! NOT their intended purpose, I'm sure, but it's what happens nonetheless. So, I had to find some blogs by moms like me.  To my surprise, there weren't many! Most of them had not been updated in a year or two. Bummer. Then...

Lightbulb!!...  (Shout out to the hilarious & delightful "Despicable Me")

...If I write it, maybe they will come! I sure hope so! Because we could use all the support we can get! LOL! No seriously, it can be tough sifting through the guilt, the jealousy and the lack of self confidence we women have in general, let alone the added (albeit self-perceived) defect of having to be a working mom. However, as a wise woman once told me:

"If you are alone with your thoughts, you believe everything you think"

We CANNOT try to do this on our own! Therefore, I commit to post more often to share with you how  I am doing with my struggle, and what I am doing to handle it. I hope you will comment and share your struggles and insights as well, that way we can help lift each other up and help each other on our way.



Well, it's getting late, so I guess I better finish nursing the baby and try to get some sleep before the next feeding. Gotta get to work in the morning, you know. LOL.

Blessings,
Dianne

PS:... Working moms, do you struggle with guilt over having to work? How do handle it? What do you do that helps?

...And to our Stay at Home counterparts, from what I hear from my friends, you have struggles of your own, as well. What do you struggle with? How do you handle it?

I'd love to hear from all of you!